Cheating and Disneyland

A foolio 10th grade boy thinks I'm not going to realize he had version D of the final but bubbled version C on his answer sheet.  And he's cheated before.  I was done.  I went to Disneyland and had a churro and an ice cream sundae and some other sweet things.  It's only 7:15 but I'm going to bed.  2 more classes take finals tomorrow.  I don't even want to think about correcting all those AP Stats tests.  Almost halfway done!

9 hours

I had kids in my room yesterday nonstop for 9 hours.  That's what happens when it's finals time I guess.      The semester ends on Thursday.  I'll have a lot of AP Stats free response questions to look at.  I really hope kids study so they are easy to correct.  I almost forgot today was Tuesday.  I had to think about it a bit.  I hate that.

Lazy

So there are good lazy days and there are bad lazy days.  This was kind of in the middle.  I am just remembering that I did indeed do 4 loads of laundry.  That was a good thing.  I actually had a meal today that was just meat and vegetables...ground lamb and boiled spinach.  It was good.  I also had 2 bananas with the last half jar of chocolate mixed nut butter, 2 oranges, 3 or 4 slices of sweet bread from Starbucks and some blueberries.  That may actually be all.  I don't feel sick to my stomach so that is a nice change.  I've cried today, more than once.  It's pretty early, but I just want to go to sleep, so I think I will.

Decisions

My parents left at 10:30am and I sat around doing stuff online like ordering pictures.  Then I have no idea what happened for about 3 hours.  I did take a nap.  When I woke up a bit after 5pm I was trying to decide if I still wanted to go to the Brea at Troy girls basketball game.  At first I wasn't going to.  I was thinking of all kinds of excuses of why I didn't want to go.  Finally I threw off the covers, took a shower and went.  We got blown out.  I'm still glad I went.  Now I am very tired.

The picture was taken yesterday outside of LACMA.  Mom and I like to have fun.

LACMA and Fogo De Chao

It was a good day at school and a fun time with the parents in LA.  I'm tired but that makes sense.  Apparently Skunky hid from the time my parents arrived until I got home an hour later.  Once he heard my voice he came out and dad mentioned, "Oh there's Skunky."

Long and Short

It was a short week since we had Monday off, but the 3 days have dragged on and on.  And there is still tomorrow.  My parents are coming to spend the night Friday.  We're going to LACMA and then to eat at a Brazilian Steakhouse.  On Saturday they'll go watch Cal Poly play at Northridge and I'll go watch Brea play at Troy.  It should be an interesting 24 hours.

So tired but I can't fall asleep...

I have been trying to go to sleep for 90 minutes.  It's not happening.  I have geometry work to look at and I was going to get up early to do that.  Right now I don't even want to go to school tomorrow.  15 minutes ago I thought about calling in for a sub, but we are reviewing in all classes for a test Thursday in Stats and the final next week in Geometry.  It's too hard to miss school now.  I see my therapist next Friday.  I need some help.

Carbs and a PR

The day started with a 19-second PR at the gym in a workout that consists of 30 clean and jerks at 95lbs.  I've done that workout before and there is no way I thought I would be faster today.  I have gained 20 pounds but apparently a little bit of it is muscle.

Then I went to Starbucks for the first of many times today.  I went to Kohl's to get a pair of jeans that actually fits and that I can wear flip flops with.  I went to Kaiser to get the first of three hepatitis b shots.  I went to Costco to buy a vacuum that was on sale.  I went to hang out with my friend's 16 month old while the friend went to swim.  I tried an italian place in Bellflower because I really wanted a calzone.  I took a 2 hour nap.  I went to Target for bandaids, hand soap and cookies.  I ate my first and last cadbury egg of the season.  I have finally decided they are way too sweet.

I did not finish correcting the geometry tests.  I did not cook any food for the week.  I can do at least one of those things now.  I think it'll be the food.  There are SO many kids who did not take the test or did not finish the test.  I have to correct a bunch of those tomorrow anyways.

About an hour ago, I almost "should have-d" myself, like I should have made lamb meatballs this weekend.  And then I stopped myself because I know that is mentally unhealthy.  I did this weekend what I needed to do...slept a lot and ate a lot and thought a lot.  Now I need to think less, eat less, and keep the sleep hours high.

I am still confused

Well, kinda.  I think I am "mad" at Florida guy for making me question what I think I want or am supposed to do with life.  I also just cried for the deceased Brea kid.  Between sobs I'm asking the air why he gets to be dead.  I know that is all wrong.  I am not asking to die.  I just don't like to be confused.

Trail Mix

I ate an entire bag of trail mix from Trader Joe's.  Not my best moment.  I also was chatting and then texting a random dude I met online at plenty of fish.  I have no idea what I'm doing.  Oh well, I kind of do because I deleted my profile after all that.  I do not want to meet someone online.  It is too hard to know if they are truly interested or if they only want one thing.  I'm done with it.  I am SO glad it is a 3 day weekend.  I have a lot to do today.

Choir Concert and a PR

I went to the choir preview night at school.  Show choir kids are amazing.  The things they do on stage are pretty cool.  It was a fun evening.  I also got a 5 rep hang clean and a 3 rep hang clean PR so that was really fun.  I had been almost on the verge of flipping out before going to the gym eating wise so getting the PR's was nice.  I didn't want to eat through the wall quite so badly.  I did eat too much today but none of it was processed sugar.  I'm trying again tomorrow to keep the calorie count at a respectable number, like 2400.

Tired

I took a nap this afternoon.  I woke up in a mini panic not remembering what day it was.  I went to the gym.  I ate a lot of calories today but still now sugar.  I just don't know.  I do and I don't.  This whole trying to eat well thing is SO difficult.  I just want to throw in the towel.  But this is 4 days without any processed sugar.  I should be happy.  But instead I'm just tired.

Almost over

I was so tired last night that I went to sleep around 8:45 but then I woke up for the first time at 12:25.  Blah.  I would really like to sleep through the night.  I miss that.  Today is a review day in all of my classes.  That can be good or bad.  I'm hoping for good.

Eating Well

I have managed to avoid sugar and flour products for 2 days.  I did have some farro at dinner and that's a grain but the no sugar has been a huge thing for me to accomplish.  I had a cup of "natural" applesauce yesterday, but again, no added sugar.  2 days down, the rest of my life to go.

211...Ugh

Hmm, so a scale is wrong or I gained 7 pounds in 4 days.  I have to start rowing again.  I've got a new chart going (see below).  2nd million meters here I come.  I tried out a new church today.  Why can't congregations reflect the diversity of the cities they are in?  I don't get it.  Well, I do and I don't.  Why can't things be the way they should be?  I am SO glad that we have next Monday off.  Thank you Martin Luther King Jr. for your non-violent activism.  It's all or nothing time again.  I need to decide.  I realize that my all is relative and applies to me only.  My all won't look like someone else's all.  That's ok.  I need to try though.  It's too easy to just quit.  I tell kids they can't quit.  I need to listen to my own advice.

Saying Bye

I visited Jack's grave today.  He was buried on December 29th so there is no headstone yet.  Some of the petals from the flower are still there.  It is a nice, small cemetery in Brea.  I will probably visit again.    I need to wait for the headstone to be there and I need to take flowers.  Someday I want to visit my grandparents' graves.  Even though 3 of them are gone, none have been buried.  I need closure.

Kids!

Today I will be having lunch with 4 former kids from Brea.  They graduated in 2011.  I had one of them in class as a freshman, 2 as sophomores, and they all were "lunch kids" for 3 years.  I love them.  They make me laugh.  The freshman also took AP Stats his senior year.  Good times.  I think the swimming in the morning will start tomorrow...maybe.

TGIF

Yay,  I have made it to Friday.  I just ate my canadian bacon, broccoli and 2 eggs.  I don't know if today will be the start of good eating or not.  We'll see.  That's kind of dumb though because I know it's my choice and no one else's.  To the shower!

204.5

That's how much the Kaiser scale said I weighed today.  Oh my.  I need to get a plan going or something.  I dunno.  I do know that I had a massive headache all day today.  I actually fell asleep briefly at lunch I was so tired.  It was a borderline migraine.  I feel so much better now that it's amazing.  I went to "open gym" and convinced another dude to do the workout we missed yesterday.  It sucked.  6 rounds of a 250m run and 20 burpees.  That's a lot of burpees and I didn't even do the pushup part.  Yup, not good.

Pastries

I ate a lot of bakery type foods today.  I spent a lot of money on these foods.  I need to save my money. I need to save my waistline.  I need to make some changes.  I hate change!

5 cups of coffee

Yesterday I went to Panera after school.  I was there 4.5 hours.  I had a bagel, a cookie, and a bear claw.  I drank a lot of coffee.  I corrected geometry quizzes and statistics tests.  I didn't even get a chance to look at the homework.  Welcome back to school.  I feel like I never left.

Movies

I finally went to see a movie.  I really like the music to Les Miserables so it was fun to see it in the theater.  I cried...multiple times.  I was ok with that.  At the end there is a line that says, "To love another person is to see the face of God."  I love that line.

Then I went to the 24 hour Walmart.  There are some interesting looking people at Walmart at 1am.  I found good stuff.  I am not ready to go back to school but I am at the same time.  It's like I have been living in an alternate universe for the past 20 days.

I'm about to wake up.

Thank Goodness...

For fun!  Yesterday on facebook I saw that 3 former students lost their dad on December 23rd.  I was shocked.  People are not supposed to die so young.  It threw me into a brief funk.  I bought the mom a card and need to send it today.  But for 2 days, I am going to have fun.  And then I'll see what happens this weekend...I have work to do for school.